Laguna Beach, MTV Suck

The Rooster has educated us very well with his statements about Laguna Beach. However, there is one thing I disagree with him on. The O.C. is not a bad television show. I happen to be a big fan of the O.C. Especially of Rachel Bilson. (right)

One of the main reasons I despise Laguna Beach is because MTV advertises it as a "reality show." I have news for you, Laguna Beach is anything but real. It is probably more scripted than the O.C. Miraculously, things happen to fall into place way too often. The "high school" drama in the show is very elementary. I just don't see how it appeals to people. A so-called reality show that is scripted. What is the point?!

And, girls, the only reason your boyfriend watches Laguna Beach is because of the girls. If that isn't the reason then I suggest you confront him about his sexuality.

MTV tried way too hard to copy the O.C. with Laguna Beach. If I were Fox, I would sue them. MTV is the biggest joke on TV these days. However, there is something interesting going on. MTV is running a new set of commercials based on old wives tales. One, for example, involves the saying that you shouldn't make a face because it could stick.

So, what's the point of the campaign? That not everything you hear is true...including the "rumor" that MTV doesn't play music.

I wonder why people get that idea. Maybe it's because you don't play music anymore. Or when you do, you have screaming teenagers doing "shout outs" during the video. Or, you only play part of the video. Or you play about, oh, 10 or so videos over and over again.

Do you civic duty and sign this petition.

But really, I swear I'm not bitter. Really.
Now, back to the Outdoor Life Network.

On Labor Day 2005, Kyle Rowland for the CBS Evening News.

If you watch Laguna Beach, you live a shallow, unaccomplished life. Feel free to do society a favor by killing yourself.

by The Rooster

Ah, yes. Monday nights, at about 8 AM. It's that time of week in the fall. I start browsing through AIM away messages, and I start seeing such idiotic blather as, "OMG LAGUNA BEACH" or "WATCHING LAGUNA BEACH WITH MY FRIENDS." (Here's a hint, you dumb bitch, if you had any friends or a life for that matter--you wouldn't be watching rich fucking pricks in California). I seriously wish I could go back in time and kick whoever thought of giving these rich fucking fags a TV show in the throat. Seriously, they're a bigger scourge on society than Adolph Hitler was.

One time, I was at my friends house, and his little sister was watching Laguna Beach. (Because that's what annoying white girls do--watch MTV). I was playing cards, but I was unfortunate enough to catch some clips of the show, and holy fuck, that was the biggest mistake of my life. I would rather suck the dick of a burned out vietnam war vet with 36 STD's and no legs than be subject to another half hour of Laguna beach, quite possibly the worst TV show since Orange County.

Seriously, they say drugs and slapping hos in rap videos is a scourge for the values of today's youth. Fuck that, atleast slapping a bitch is productive. Shows like Laguna Beach are a bigger threat to society. I have ACT scores to match the IQ's of the girls who watch this TV show. (And I got an 18, so eat shit you shallow ass whores). Seriously, what the fuck makes these fags in Laguna Beach worthy of a TV show? I'd really like to fucking know. Steven, the "hottie" of the show is the biggest fucking queer I've ever seen in my life. I don't care if he's getting his dick sucked. I wish he'd get punched in the fucking throat and then stabbed repeatedly. And then I hope all the bitches on the show become pregnant and die miserable, painful deaths.

Seriously, if you watch this how, just kill yourself. There is no way you can enjoy this show and have anything productive to offer to society in general. Just get the fuck out of the way and make way for people who have the intellect above a carrot.

Psalm 55:22

If your heart is weighed down, the Lord is ready to bear every burden you give Him.